When the plane touched down in Arlington, Virginia, Brie felt her heart sink. She looked over to David who kept touching up and retouching up his speech for the funeral. “David, baby, it’s perfect the way it is. Don’t mess with it anymore”, she said.
“I want it to be perfect. Matt was just as much my brother as he was yours. I want to honor his memory the right way.”
“I know, baby, and he’s probably in heaven looking down and going, ‘DUDE! STOP OBSESSING! YOU AND I BOTH KNOW I WASN’T A SAINT!’”
David laughed. “That’s for sure, far from it. Neither am I.”
“No one’s perfect. That’s my point. Stop obsessing over what you’re going to say.”
“I’m not used to having a script, baby. I’m used to saying whatever pops into my head at the right moment. This is an odd experience for me.”
“I know, but whatever you say will be perfect and Matt will be happy with it. Just use what you have there as an outline. Paraphrase, ad lib a little. You don’t have to say what you have written there verbatim.”
“How is it that even as we’re about to bury your brother that you still know exactly what to say?”
She shrugged. “Like I told you before; it’s a gift.”
“You can say that again.”
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Malachai and Amanda sat on the opposite side of the aisle from his parents. Malachai was playing with is guitar pick as they waited for the pilot to give the deboarding call. Amanda couldn’t help but notice his tension. “Malachai, honey, what’s wrong?”
“What’s right would be the better question. Nothing is the answer to that one.”
“What’s bothering you?”
“I want to get the hell off of this plane. I hate flying.”
“And you want to travel the world to perform to thousands of people?”
“Let me rephrase that; I hate flying when it’s for something this unpleasant.”
“Ah, see, that makes more sense.”
“I know that he was sick, and I know he knew he was going to die. Hell, I knew he was going to die, but why the night after he saw the band on stage for the first time?”
“He found peace and he was ready to go.”
Malachai looked at his fiancée. “You know something? You have the same gift my mother does for knowing exactly what to say and when to say it.”
She smiled at that. “I try. I mean, I know what it’s like to lose someone close to me. I remember when I lost my parents. The memories are vague, but I remember what it was like. I was overcome in this deep sorrow that I couldn’t shake. Over time, I became numb to the pain. It didn’t help that my Aunt and Uncle were abusing me, but eventually, I let my parents go. I know it’s going to take time for all of you to move on after the loss of Uncle Matt. But, eventually, it won’t hurt as much anymore.”
He looked over at this future wife and smiled softly. “I love you, Mandy. You’re my strength.”
“And I love you, Malachai. You’re my saving grace.”
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Once everyone was settled into their hotel rooms, Jordan and Malachai went to the church with Logan and Caleb so that they could rehearse and get used to the sound system at Our Lady Queen of Peace. “I want to run through the song a couple of times so that I know that none of us will fuck up tomorrow”, Jordan said in the car on the way there. She looked over her shoulder to the three people in the back seat of the car. Logan, Caleb and Maddie were crammed into the back with Maddie in the middle. She wasn’t paying any attention to what was going on. She had her iPod in and didn’t care. She was making sure that she knew where to come in when they played Taps at the cemetery when their uncle was put in the ground. She had discussed with their Aunt Jenn singing at the cemetery when Matt was laid to rest. Jenn talked to the bugler to see if he had any problem with Matt’s niece singing as he played. He was ok with it.
“That’s a really good idea, Jordan”, Logan said. “The last thing any of us wants to do is screw up at Matt’s funeral.”
“I know that’s right”, Caleb said.
Malachai looked at his sister from the drivers’ seat of the car. “Are you sure you’re going to be able to sing tomorrow without falling apart?” he asked her.
“I don’t see why not. I mean, it’s going to be hard, but it’s not going to be a cake walk either. I’m sure I’m going to be crying, but it’s the mark of a good performer to be able to channel any sadness or anger- any emotion- into their art. That’s what I intend to do in order to keep my voice from cracking.”
“Could someone remind me why we brought Maddie with us?” Caleb asked.
“She’s meeting with the bugler to rehearse singing Taps when Uncle Matt is lowered into his grave”, Logan said. “That’s why Maddie is along for the ride.”
“Why is she singing Taps with the bugler during the burial?”
“Because she asked Aunt Jenny if she could”, Malachai said.
“Ah. Ok. I think I understand now.”
“Don’t hurt yourself trying to wrap your tiny little mind around it, Caleb. We need you firing on all cylinders today and tomorrow”, Jordan said brashly. “The last thing I want is to have to kick your scrawny ass for fucking up at my uncle’s funeral service.”
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After their rehearsal and Maddie’s meeting with the bugler was over, they all went back to the hotel for dinner and a little bit of rest before the hardest day any of the Draiman children had ever been through. Sleeping that night would not be easy for any of the Draiman family.
Before going to bed that night, David talked with the other guys. “I think I want to go back in the studio, guys”, he told them.
“Why now?” John asked
“I need catharsis after all of this. I need to vent.”
“Venting to Brie isn’t helping?” Mike asked.
“It’s not that. I just need to get back into the studio here soon.”
Up until that point all Dan had done was nod. “I’m cool with going back into the studio. I’ve actually brought some stuff for you approval, David. Take it home with you and let’s see what you can come up with.”
David smiled and punched him lightly in the arm. “Thanks, Danny. Nice to know someone’s thinking of me.”
--------------
David and Brie were both restless that night. They tried to lay down to get some rest but ended up spending their night watching television. As she sat on the bed curled up against her husband’s side, she looked up at him in the dim light of the TV. “What are you thinking?” she asked.
“Thinking about tomorrow and how much seeing Matt laying in a casket is going to suck.”
“I know. Seeing him laying there is really going to make it sink in, I think. Well, for me at least.”
“Same here. It’s going to blow hard.” They lapsed into silence. She adjusted the way she was lying against him and her arm inadvertently brushed below his waist, making him shudder. “What the hell are you doing?” he asked breathlessly.
“I was just trying to get comfortable again.”
He sighed. There was a hint of disappointment to it. “I wish you wouldn’t have stopped. I need the distraction and so do you.”
She readjusted again. This time she put herself in his lap, her knees on either side of his hips. “You want me to make you forget for a little bit that you have to give a speech tomorrow?”
“Yes, and I want to make you forget for a little bit that you’re burying your brother tomorrow.”
She leaned in and pressed her lips to his in an attempt to do what he was asking of her. Her lips were soft against his and she tried to push both of their grief and pain away from them; if only for a few minutes.
He forced his sweats off of his hips and lifted her gown as she moved against him. With one simple thrust of his hips, he had pushed his way into her opening. She cried out softly against his lips as her hips moved with his.
--------------
At the other end of the hall, Malachai and Amanda were doing the same thing. She straddled his waist and slowly worked her hips to the rhythm in her head. There were so many things that she wanted to do for him, but this was the only one she could think of to help him forget his grief for only a little bit.
His hands slid up her back as he held her expanding body against him. With the way he was sitting, he couldn’t do a lot to help her, but he did what he could. He was just glad that he had someone to help him forget his pain for a moment.
She wanted him with every fiber of her being. She needed him with everything she had. His pain was her pain and vice versa. She was going to do whatever it took to help him rid himself of the hurt he was feeling because she couldn’t stand seeing him in any sort of pain.
--------------
The morning came and everyone got ready for the funeral. Brie wore a black blouse with a low neck line, black slacks and a pair of black boots. She straightened her hair so that it laid flat against her head.
David’s suit was black. His shirt was made of silk and was black. His shoes were black. There was only one aspect of color in what he wore that day and that was his tie which was made of white silk. He’d decided not to wear the most recognizable things that set him apart in a crowd. His labret piercings stayed at the hotel. He wanted to blend in as much as possible today. The last thing he wanted was to turn his brother in law’s funeral into a media circus because some rabid fan recognized him and the other guys. It was bad enough that he was going to be called on by name during the service. He wanted people to do double takes when they looked at him. He wanted them to ask themselves, “Is that REALLY David Draiman?”
All of the Draiman boys wore black suits with white shirts and different colored ties. Each of the boys was allowed to chose what color their tie would be.
Jordan’s dress was short- cut to mid thigh- and had no sleeves. She wore black thigh high stockings to keep her legs warm and to keep her feet from sliding around in the open toe heels she was wearing. After putting on the platinum jewelry that she was borrowing from her mother and straightening her bangs, she helped her little sisters finish getting dressed. There was a heaviness in Jordan’s heart as she helped Maddie, Meagan, Makayla, and Jessi finish getting ready for the funeral. She’d seen a lot of shit in her near fifteen years. More than any fifteen year old girl should have to go through or see. But, her little sisters- especially little Jessykah- were innocents. They were nowhere near as prepared for what they were about to experience. She thought of this while she put on her makeup and helped her little sisters with their hair. I don’t think there’s a power on this planet that can prepare a soul for losing a loved one. I just wish that there were something I could say to ease my little sisters’ suffering, she thought to herself. Her thoughts were interrupted by the ringing of her cell phone. It played “Warrior” as it’s ringtone. “Warrior” just seemed fitting because of where they were. When she answered it, the caller ID said that it was her father calling. “Yes, Daddy?” she said.
“Are you girls ready to go?” he asked.
“Almost. I’m putting the finishing touches on Meagan’s hair before we leave.”
“Make it quick. We don’t want to be late.”
“Yes, sir. We’ll meet you all in the lobby.”
“Alright, Jordan. But, make it snappy.” And he hung up.
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